Death
On Monday night I was laying in bed and my neck started hurting in a weird way. I thought, "that's a strange pain...I wonder if some vein is about to burst and kill me."
Then I thought, "well, if I die in the next couple minutes, at least I'm happy. Yeah, I'm really happy. Tonight was awesome. This wouldn't be a bad time or way to die. In my bed, smiling."
Then another thought struck me. "Do I want to die happily in my bed, or do I want death to come in the midst of pain and struggle while doing something good for someone else?"
And then I felt bad because the answer is happy in my bed. I realized I'm not a very sympathetic or compassionate person. I'm actually pretty selfish. Shouldn't I prefer to die for a greater cause? Like saving orphans or rescuing cats from a burning house?
posted by heather hub at 5:05 PM
3 Comments:
rescusing cats, definitely.
on a serious note though... i think the goal would be to die happy in your bed... but happy because you know you've lived the life God has called you to live. you know you've been the friend, sister, daughter, (wife), (mother), philanthropist, etc. He intended you to be.
that's my hope... and knowing that i'm not yet any of those things to the extent of my potential makes me know it's not time yet... and when i'm having a rare unselfish moment, i'm grateful He's given me more time.
4:15 PM
Ironically, I've been wishing you would rescue more cats. Don't rescue any tiny dogs from being sent away because they have "digging" problems, though. You are way too quick to do that. But cats and puppies that will grow into big dogs--those you can save.
4:38 PM
rescusing?
did i really write that?
3:21 PM
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